Now, I am fairly close to what I want my novel to be.
So, in preparation for it\s launch, and after many requests, I thought I would leave a teaser for you here of the Prologue and the intro to chapter 1. I imagine when the editor gets it, it will change a bit, but I will start off with how it looks now.
I hope you enjoy it...Completing Your Life
Prologue
I think that
you’ll find that my story is not much different than yours. I was an ordinary
man with a simple life. I lived and existed surrounded by my thoughts and
feelings, all of which were very significant to me. These led me to platforms
in my life where I made decisions from the choices in front of me. I made many
choices and many more decisions in my life, and looking back at them all now, I
can see one that stands out distinctly inside of all the rest which started off
a series of events that became the life that I lived into. I often wonder what
would have happened had that instance not occurred, and how the rest of my life
would have played out. Eventually I caught myself, and know that it all happened
perfectly, even when I didn’t realize why it was happening.
I realized a
long time ago that it was my agenda in life which was really stopping me from
what it was that I thought I wanted. As it turned out, it really didn’t matter
what I thought I wanted; it really came down to what it was that I needed.
Unknowingly, my wants became my needs, and this caused my life to get caught
into a vicious circle; a downward spiral of feeling trapped in every area in my
life. I was completely overwhelmed and had no idea how to break this cycle. I
held no control over my life, and this fear dominated me in every manner of
being.
The most
affected of all of these was my love life. It is an area of such significance
to people, and certainly I was no exception. Throughout my entire life, I
searched and yearned for a partner who understood me; someone who had my back
and loved me the way I wanted and needed to be loved, even when I didn’t know
how to do it myself.
Wonderful women
came and left my life, and the impact of each one affected me so that I became
a different person each time the next love came along. I started off in these
relationships being loving and caring. Then over time, I became increasingly
more jaded, less trusting, cynical, and a host of other negative emotions that
each future partner paid for unknowingly. What I didn’t realize is that each
time, something was telling me with surprising detail that these relationships
weren’t a proper fit for me. I was unwilling to listen because I was so attached
to these feelings of significance. I held on to my view like it was my life’s
prized possession and refused to give it up to anything new, and this became
the reality I lived into. I was determined to do it my way, and nobody was
going to tell me otherwise.
Perhaps it
wasn’t as bad as I am making it out to be; our lives never are. I was so busy
looking at what wasn’t working in my life, that I wasn’t appreciating or
acknowledging what was working. One of the biggest observations that I had in
my early twenties is the battle of time and money. Some people had lots of
money, but very little free time. A lot of people I knew also had a lot of free
time, but very little money. But very few people I knew had a lot of money, and
a lot of time in their lives. This provided the element of choice, and from
choices like this, you could create any possibility you choose.
By the time I
was 26, I had saved up enough money to experience time and money in the same
moment. I had always wanted to experience backpacking through Europe, so one
day I took action. Instead of wondering if it was the right decision or time in
my life to do so, I bought a Eurail pass for ninety days which enabled me to
get on and off any train in almost all of Europe. The day that I committed to
purchasing that ticket launched me on the path which defined my life as I knew
it. It was one action which lead into another, which opened up the world of cause
and effect and what became my life.
It is this
journey and the story it became that I would like to share with you.
Chapter 1
To me, it all
comes down to the final five minutes of your life.
In those final
moments, everything that mattered to you gets measured on a scale of yes or no.
All the money in the world cannot buy you a do-over, and there are no second
chances when you are confronted with your own mortality. Those precious seconds
get compounded by a fight for life, and the need for being understood. The
fulfillment of your legacy then gets left open for interpretation. If you are
able to convey your last words to have closure with your life, or be surrounded
by your loved ones, you may have less room for interpretation. In the end, did
you leave a firm understanding on how you wanted to leave the unique story of
your life? If your time ends suddenly, are you fully prepared and complete with
leaving how you lived your life?
Most of us leave
this life with life insurance for our family and loved ones. Yet, rarely do we
leave emotional life insurance to provide closure for us and our beloved. We toil
to create a legacy which can get clouded at the finish line because we don’t attain
closure in every aspect that matters in our lives. This leaves us with words
unsaid, and the opportunity that is forever lost.
I wondered why I
never thought about this growing up. It was never brought up or talked about in
my family. Besides, I was caught in the world of accumulation, and I felt invincible to the world. It took
something that rattled my belief system to force me to look at this. Suddenly, all
the things that I chased as a young man seemed pointless, and I was left with
the moments that defined my time on this earth. Before I realized it, a bright
flash filled my vision and my life flashed before my eyes. In an instant, the
gateway to my life opened up.
I remember it all starting on the
hottest day in summer. Of course it was only the middle of June, yet the heat
was unrelenting that day. I was leaving in less than two weeks to backpack throughout
Europe for the entire summer, and my friends had decided to send me off with a
goodbye party. It was the start of summer in Canada, and the heat draws out
people to patios, pools, beaches, and other areas where they come to gather on
hot summer days. Though I complained about the sweltering heat and humidity,
which turned my flowing locks of curls into a dizzying array of spider web entanglements,
I soldiered on. My friends and I went downtown Toronto seeking meaningless fun,
unaware that I had my own date with destiny...