This is the
first part in a 2 part blog sharing about my correspondence with Ray Jasper,
who was tried, convicted of Capital Murder and executed on March 19, 2014.
I first
read Ray Jasper’s letter to Gawker on March 6th. I saw it on my
facebook, and took the time to read it. After I had finished reading it, I put
everything else on hold and immediately found myself writing him a letter. I’ve
spent a lot of time asking myself tough questions about why I did this. In
fact, when I posted on my facebook that I had written and mailed a letter off
to Ray Jasper, I received many opinions of anger, but also of support.
I can
understand why some people would ask why I chose to write a letter to the
perpetrator of the murder, and not to the family of the victim. I can also
understand people asking me what I wanted to accomplish by writing a letter to
Ray Jasper, and these are fair questions.
I want to
be clear from the start that I am in NO way glorifying what Ray Jasper was
convicted of in the murder of David Alejandro. I have nothing but the deepest
sympathies for the family and friends of Alejandro, who have grieved his loss
to this very day. I am not glorifying a murderer or giving his heinous act
against a fellow human undue press or attention. Ray Jasper was executed on
March 19 for his part in the murder of Alejandro and he has paid his debt to
society and he’s square with what he owed.
I also want
to be clear that I do not feel sorry for Ray Jasper for what he had done, his
conviction and subsequent execution. The laws state the consequences of murder,
and we all know what they are.
Instead,
what I hope to accomplish in writing and covering this, is a story in which we
can all collectively understand and gain some insight.
I want to
begin with the quote from the movie The Shawshank Redemption. The character of
Ellis Boyd Redding, (or “Red” as we knew him) who was played by Morgan Freeman,
had his final parole hearing after committing murder and serving 40 years of a
life sentence. Red was asked if he felt that he had been “rehabilitated.” Below
is the dialogue from that scene.
1967 Parole Hearings Man:
Ellis Boyd Redding, your files say you've served 40 years of a life sentence.
Do you feel you've been rehabilitated?
Red: Rehabilitated? Well,
now let me see. You know, I don't have any idea what that means.
1967 Parole Hearings Man:
Well, it means that you're ready to rejoin society...
Red: I know what you think
it means, sonny. To me it's just a made up word. A politician's word, so young
fellas like yourself can wear a suit and a tie, and have a job. What do you
really want to know? Am I sorry for what I did?
1967 Parole Hearings Man:
Well, are you?
Red:
There's not a day goes by I don't feel regret. Not because I'm in here, or
because you think I should. I look back on the way I was then: a young, stupid
kid who committed that terrible crime. I want to talk to him. I want to try and
talk some sense to him, tell him the way things are. But I can't. That kid's
long gone and this old man is all that's left. I got to live with that.
Rehabilitated? It's just a bullshit word. So you go on and stamp your form,
sonny, and stop wasting my time. Because to tell you the truth, I don't give a
shit.
And with
that, they released a convicted murderer back into society. Of course, this was
only in a movie, yet as we watched Red’s character evolve throughout the story,
we are on his side. I’m quite sure that there were very few people who watched
that movie who were upset that Red was released from prison. We knew that Red had
moved on from being the person he was 40 years ago who had “committed that
terrible crime” and saw his transformation into an old man who befriended Andy
Dufresne. We became elated at the end of the movie when these 2 felons who were
both convicted of murder, were re-united in a wonderfully scripted happy
ending.
So, the
best way I can describe my feelings of wanting to reach out to Ray Jasper is
that when I read his letter, I felt his transformation. His post was an
intelligent, calculated and articulate reply in conveying what most of us
people on the free side of prison may spend our entire lives seeking, and still
not understand it.
What
baffled me was here was a young man sitting on death row, knowing that he was
scheduled to die, and yet he was doing more reading, and soul searching than
most people I know living in freedom. In many ways, I believe that Ray Jasper
was the freest man in prison and certainly more empowered than some of the
people I know in society. Certainly, he demonstrated courage and dedication to
what little time he had left on this earth by preparing his soul for his
inevitable demise.
As it
occurs to me, we spend our entire lives refining our character in learning,
growing and expanding as human beings so that we can better ourselves and raise
a family to do the same. Perhaps sitting in jail, Ray Jasper didn’t have to
deal with the life of accumulation that we are all caught up in, so he could
spend more time on learning and growing wiser. I’m sure the 15 years that he
spent in jail, he did a lot of growing and maturing. So I’m clear that he was
not the same man at the end of his life that he was when he first arrived in
prison.
I know that
I am certainly not the same man that I was 15 years ago, nor would I want
someone to relate or refer to me now as if I was. In fact, I believe that none
of us would want to be judged now by what or who we were 15 years ago.
Yet the act
of murder is something that defines that, isn’t it. It’s not like the same
title as being a thief, a liar or a cheat now is it? Just because you were a
thief, a liar or a cheat 15 years ago, doesn't mean that you are those
qualities now, does it? But we hold murderers to a different accountability of
judgement. Once a murderer, always a murderer.
There will
be people who read this post and applaud my actions and call me brave. There
will also be people who will spew venom out of their mouths calling me names,
trying to defend their point of view which is contrary to mine. I want to say
that I’m fine with both. Whichever view you chose to judge me by, I’m ok with
that. I don’t require support or negative feedback to feel validated in what I
did. What I do hope you get is a new perspective that works for you inside of
this story. Whatever that is for you, I hope you find it.
So let’s
get back to why I wrote Ray Jasper, and in the next post, I'll talk specifically as to why I wrote him.... To be continued.