Catch a Tiger by the Toe. Tiger Cheats...

Headline:

Billionaire elite athlete cheats on Wife

What a surprise...This gives new meaning to the terms "Tiger Slam" and the "Tiger fist pump"...

Let me illustrate...

I remember about 11 years ago that I was sitting in a barber shop in Lillehammer, Norway getting the world's most expensive haircut for a guy and "reading" the newspaper. I say "reading" because it was in Norwegian. There was front page picture with a quote, and the barber translating what it said.

This was in August, 1998. It was a picture of Bill Clinton and the quote was "I cheated"

The barber said to me, "I don't understand you Americans."

I immediately went into explaining that I was NOT an American, as all Canadians do when confronted with such an accusation.

"I don't understand you North Americans. If that was our King or Prime Minister, it wouldn't make the front page of the newspaper. We just don't care."

I believed him too. Hell, a couple years when the French Prime Minister died, he had his Wife, his mistress, and his girlfriend all sitting together in the front row at his funeral.

And something tells me that if he could do that in death, he could've pulled it off in real life too... Something tells me that the French or Italians for that matter, wouldn't elect a man who didn't have at least a Wife AND a mistress. It would be like, "why would we elect man that only one woman wanted?!" Or "Who could trust a guy who only wanted to sleep with just ONE woman while being our country's leader?"

It's just not good European philosophy. After all, these people really invented cheating, and it's a tradition that goes back hundreds, if not thousands of years.

But let's get back to Tiger!!

I don't like Tiger and I never have. For a variety of reasons, I just don't like him. I know that he's the most talented golfer ever, and that he makes 100 million a year, but that doesn't mean shit to me. In fact, I would have gained more respect for him if he would not be publicly grovelling for forgiveness, and just either shut his mouth and told the press it's none of their business, and sort it out himself.

For God sakes, be a man Tiger.

We hold these celebrities to higher levels than this!! We all KNOW they all cheat, but somehow we, as the prolitarians want to believe, that they have the Prince Charming-Cinderella romance without any smears.

Excrement...

And it's not Tiger's fault either. His wife Elin should know the drill. That these people, men especially, cheat. They just get so much ass thrown at them, that they simply cannot stay straight. It's not a matter of "If", it's a matter of "When"

Give you an example... If I were blogging here, and President Obama found my obscure notes, and actually liked them and wanted to meet me... That would be amazing. Problem is, that shit just won't ever happen. The reason why, is that I don't roll in Obama's circle of friends. It's just about going to be impossible for me to meet him; and even if I did, I would feel so far out of my comfort zone with those people, that I would be a complete loser.

So in order for Elin Woods to have met Tiger means that she has to roll with that crowd of people. All those women know about pre-nups and cheating men, because at that level, men are going to do what they want to and buy themselves out of it. It's just a cost of doing business. So before dating and marrying Tiger, she would know and be exposed to all of this. So for her to be surprised? That either makes her the biggest Optimist, or the dumbest, clueless loser that is out there.

Now there are reports that Tiger is trying to buy her way into staying with a better pre-nup and sweetening the deal for her to feel less embarrassed. Yeah, money will do that to a person...

You see, the American public who watches Tiger and buys his Nike Shoes and Buick cars and all the other endorsements he sells, wants to believe in his pretty boy, clean, American image. He can't be a rogue like A-Rod, Charlie Sheen, or some other bad boy celebrity. That just wouldn't be acceptable to Americans who buy this pretty-boy image.

But when it comes down to it, it's all about money and power isn't it? He can literally buy anything he wants; it's just a matter of how much it's going to cost him.

I think he would be better off like George Clooney or Derek Jeter. Nobody questions why they aren't married, and they get the best of everything that Tiger and the like do anyway.

Instead of handling it this way, I think the next time he wants to do this, he should go down to where ever men of his status meet women, and find a woman that he doesn't like. He should walk up to that woman and just hand her the keys to a brand new Mansion, car and access to a few million dollars that she can use at her disgretion.

Because that's exactly the way that it's going to end up anyway...