Monday, October 20, 2014

Things THIS Father Wants His Daughter to Know... Part 1

Things THIS Father Wants His Daughter to Know… Part 1

Every once in a while, I see a post from someone who says the top 10 things that a parent says to their daughter. I am no exception to this. I am a Father to a soon-to-be six year old daughter, and these are some of the things I would want her to know about having an amazing life.
I have written this by using the term “your partner” because you may choose to Love a man or a woman. I will Love, support, and respect either choice you make.
These are the things I will tell her…

1) Love is different.
From the time you were born, you learned what Love is from the first male figure, which is me (your Father), Grandfather, step father and other supporting cast roles. We Love you in 2 ways.
A) A-sexually
B) Unconditionally
The person you end up falling in Love with, will Love you differently. They will Love you sexually, and for conditions. This is the complete opposite of what you’ve learned about Love. So understand that Love is different to each and every person.
You are responsible for knowing how you need and want to be Loved, and then communicating that to your partner so that they can support you in the way you feel Loved. You will also do the same for them so that they feel Loved on their terms. But don’t resent your partner for not Loving you the way I do. It’s not better or worse, it’s just different.
2) You are the cause of inspiration of every relationship you are in.
Women are the source of inspiration. They inspire their partners to greatness. Whatever you want in a relationship, it is done by inspiring your partner, not dominating or controlling them. When you inspire them, they will find another gear inside of them they didn’t know they had. This will create greatness and abundance. If you control or dominate them, they will eventually resent you, and it’s just a matter of time and circumstance until the relationship fails. Choose to inspire
3) Have wonderful sex!
Sex is a wonderful gift. It is a tool to express yourself and your Love. Use it as such, not a weapon or reward. Sharing your body with someone is sharing a part of your soul with them. Don’t allow anyone to influence you on what is acceptable or unacceptable with sex. Regret or guilt has no place inside of Lovemaking. You choose what you desire and what you like. So be confident in your own skin and enjoy. Any person who you chose to sleep with is your business, and you don’t need to justify it to anyone, ever. Not even to me. I will respect any partner you have chosen.
4) Do it your way
Life won’t work any other way for you. Please don’t live your life with “what would Daddy do?” –It’s irrelevant what I would do, I’m not you! Don’t accept my religion, beliefs or values. I have different tools, strengths and weaknesses than you do. Discover your own truth, and question everything. You won’t be happy living your life with someone else’s belief system at the helm. Learn what you believe to be true. You will fail and make mistakes, but do it with your belief system and not anyone else’s. It will eventually serve you in the long run. Think for yourself, and you will always develop.

5) I will always be your #1 Fan
There is literally nothing you can’t tell me because I will make it safe for you. The world will judge you, but I am here on this earth to Love and support you to be the greatest person you can be. You will make mistakes and I understand this. My role is to prepare and support you, pick you up, and Lovingly send you back into the game of life. But I will always be your #1 Fan.
6) Pay yourself first
A happy “you” works for the world. Never feel guilty, ashamed or embarrassed for creating energy the way you need to. Find whatever tools they may be, but use them often. Whether they be sleep, baths, spas, movies or whatever, charge your batteries because nobody else will. Finding a partner and communicating this to them is crucial. If you are overwhelmed, you can’t help anybody, especially yourself.

7) Self Worth is EVERYTHING

How you see yourself is how others will see you. Treat yourself with Love and kindness, ESPECIALLY when you don’t seem to think you deserve it. Self-Worth is an acquired and learned necessity. Everything you are revolves around how you think and treat yourself. Nothing is more important than having authentic self-worth.

8) Communication is Power

If you want something, ASK. When you were a little girl, we asked you to “use your words” to get what you want. That lesson never stops. The world and people will never know what it is you want unless you tell it. You create your reality with your words in everything you do. So always, always be in communication about your thoughts and desires. When you tell people, some will say yes and some will say no. But in that process, you will always find the right people to support you in achieving your goal. Sometimes, getting a “No” is the best gift you can get. Life’s rejections, are God’s Protections.

9) Choose a partner you can run with, not drag
A partner who is a good fit, allows you to cover more ground. You empower them, and they empower you. That’s why it’s called a partnership. Align yourself with someone who has passion and kindness and don’t try to “fix” them. Nobody wants to be fixed. If you support and inspire them, they will be responsible for their own self-improvement. If they don’t do these things, they are not a proper fit for you.

10) Not every relationship works.
People come into your life for a reason, season or a lifetime. If it’s a reason, there is a lesson or purpose that they are bringing to you. When the lesson is learned, it might be time to move on. If they come into your life for a season, they are there to support you for a short time to get you to the next part of your journey. It is a wonderful feeling, but it is only for a season, then it is time to move on. Few people will come into your life for a Lifetime. They are pillars in your life, so recognizing which people fit where, is important. When you can recognize them, you can release them and allow them to go with Love, and not the malice you may feel because they haven’t been who you want them to be. Recognize who they are, and they can never disappoint you.

To be continued, Part 2 will follow…

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